Whom Do We Like? What Does It Say About Us

The other day I was talking to a friend (A) of mine who told me that her husband is picky about what people are really like while she herself likes people whom she can relate to and doesn't care how her friends are intrinsically or how her friends behave with others. She specifically pointed out to me that her husband was more interested in what people were basically like rather than how he got along with some X. You got the difference?

When I heard this I just acknowledged what I heard and didn't think too much then about what she said.

Until I spoke with another friend (B) of mine today. She has a brother-in-law (BIL). From what she, my friend B, had told me about her BIL and his wife (we will call her SIL), I had taken an intense dislike to her BIL and SIL years earlier  - remember, BIL and SIL were married to each other and their marriage was and, I assume still, is a good one.

My friend B herself didn't disapprove of them as much as I did. They lived in a joint family and I had never spoken to or met either of them (SIL, BIL). Subsequently family events turned out such that my friend was hardly on speaking terms with the couple. And today she told me that she finally spoke to her SIL. While they didn't kiss and make up, they both wished each other the best and acknowledged that they never will become bosom buddies. Well they aren't going to be talking much to each other either in the future.

Now, I disliked the SIL and BIL right from the beginning. While my friend B was ok with them earlier and now. But in in the interim when events turned out badly, she could hardly speak a word to either of them.

Now we come to the fun part.

Both my friends A and B seem to like people without regard to what they deeply are like. So long as people were OK with them that was enough. Deep evaluation of, and subsequent rejection of, people wasn't the way they operated.

Unlike A's husband and me. We disliked people based on what they were really like. We didn't have to wait for events which affected us personally to reject people.

What makes A and B behave one way and A's husband and me another? Perhaps it's a question of introverts and extroverts? Or Feelers and Thinkers? Or Intuitives and Sensitives? Or Judgers and Perceivers (as in MBTI)?