A friend of mine told me today that I was her only friend whom she could laugh with, with no pretensions.
I have been told by many friends that they could just be themselves with me. (Of course I have also been told by one friend that talking to me was like talking to a piece of furniture! And hence she could share anything with me while she would be cagey about sharing stuff with others.)
That brings the question: what's so special or unique in me that people can be themselves with me? Do I not judge people? Of course I do, all the time and my friends are quite aware of my tendency to judge. So why me? Why no pretensions?
I had to scratch my hair, what little there is of it.
Conversation is like a dance.
If you can think of a dance: a ballroom dance (like the Edelweiss in Sound of Music) and compare it to a brisk walk. You will see the difference. Most of us would be very wary of dancing in a ballroom than a walk
The former requires elegance, you have to dance nicely. While walking, on the other hand, there are no strict rules to be followed. You can be yourself.
I am a person with little emotional intelligence unlike others. Talking to me is like taking a brisk walk. Talking to others is like dancing in a ballroom.
An environment of inelegance lets you relax. You don't have to dress up, you don't have to follow protocols. Though, it's quite likely that elegant people may not prefer inelegance all the time.
That perhaps explains why many people tell me that they can be themselves with me.
Boohoo, I will only be a walk and never a ballroom. Bye bye, Edelweiss.
But then I am easier to talk to and nice, as a change. Emotional unintelligence does have its use!
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