Survival Basics 101

Essential skills for survival

1. You do what you want to do but do preach the virtue of being honest, generous, hard working, diligent, focused.
2. You should tell people how others are trying to take advantage of you - explain who is doing what to them. While you yourself surreptitiously might do the same with others.
3. You should tell people you how helpful you are. It doesn't matter that when others need help you are somehow unavailable.
4. You should say that people ought to be evaluated based on their pain and on their intentions to do the right thing and sweetness rather than on their actions. Actions are very obvious while pain and intentions are not. This gives us a lot of cushion to not do stressful things while not being punished for not doing those things.
5. Make sure you don't take up any job that gives you inadequate returns. 
6. Make sure that you never say No directly. Explain your situation so that it becomes obvious to the other person that your answer has to be a No.
7. Make sure you always do the rewarding jobs first - do not make the mistake of finishing jobs just because they are in the queue. If your queue is empty, people will fill your queue. To achieve this end make sure everyone knows how sick, poor or busy you are. You will be excused for not being able to take up a job while at the same time you get the leeway to pick and choose things that are rewarding socially, financially or emotionally.
8. Always delay helping others until they become desperate. The value of your help increases when people are desperate than when they aren't.
9. Always delay doing things until the deadline. Doing it earlier wont give you bonus points - remember you are not in school. In life, if you delay there are many advantages. Example: A. Someone else might end up doing the job. B. You will get more clarity on the job through feedback from people who did the job earlier as to what is expected of the job (applicable in cases where many people have to do the job). 
10. Always ensure people are aware of your help. If they aren't your then situation is no better than if you didn't help. 
11. Make sure your actions are never rule based and consistent. That will push you into a corner. Your behavior becomes predictable and hence easy for others to manipulate. Inconsistent behavior is always better than consistent behavior.
12. Be empathetic. A kind ungenerous nature is always more rewarding than an unempathetic but generous behavior. 
13. Our resources are limited. Say often that you like or love others. But like or love others only as a chocolate and not as a child. Do not squander your resources on "children" that are not yours. (Read https://vbala99.blogspot.com/2017/02/understanding-love.html)
14. In a situation where you have both rights and obligations, make sure you enjoy the rights before others. And ensure you are the last to be handed the obligations. 
15. If you aren't happy, you can't make anyone else happy. People avoid those that are unhappy. Make sure you do things that make you happy. Far better that you do things that make you happy and feel a little regret than forgo those things and live a lifetime of regret and unhappiness. Life is about doing what you want. To that end make sure you A. say the right things, B. Do what you want and finally C. If asked to, explain your circumstances and get a clean chit. Remember that saying the right things does not mean doing the right things. People value what you say. The marginal utility of doing the right things is minimal.
16. Learn the right things to say. These are crucial to make the right impression. A. We should be generous, our left hand shouldn't know what our right hand is doing. B. I am your benefactor. I always love to help. C. I never intended to ... D. It's not enough if you are generous, intelligent, honest. How you make others happy is what is most important in life. D. I work 18 hours a day. E. My health isn't good but I have to keep working in order to...
17. Never sacrifice your best interests for someone else. "Allah ko pyaari hau Qurbani." - Let Allah and Christ practice it, not you.
18. Know always which resources are critical. Never cede control of those critical resources (property, spouse, son etc).
19. When someone accuses you of something, you don't have to consider their allegation and check if it's true. We are not born in this world to be arbiters of truth. We are here to survive. So we can go through the "I didn't mean it routine". There are even better ways to handle the situation. We can make ourselves the injured party by claiming that we are extremely hurt by the allegation. See, we have not even accepted that we did whatever was alleged. We have twisted the issue to one of us being hurt. Not many people would continue to deride us with what we supposedly did, they would be on the defensive and backtrack immediately. Score: 1 for us, 0 for them. Other variants include us finding their tone to be too harsh, their looks to be lecherous (if the genders are appropriate) and so on. The assault has been thwarted. To quote a cliche, "shikaari khud ban baya shikaar (the hunter has become the hunted)".
20. Remember survival is a line function activity. Every act of yours has to ensure the survival of you and your nearest / dearest. We come with limited resources into this world and we can't squander them. Hence we have to focus on knowledge on a broad range of topics (even if limited in breadth in each) than get lost in the depth of one topic at the cost of breadth. Leave staff function to suckers focusing on depth or to other morons who are best hidden in a staff function. 
21. Never pledge your own resources in any venture. Beg, borrow, steal or volunteer someone else's resources. But keep your own resources safe.

Make sure you hang on to people who do not have these skills. They are good banks to withdraw from without having to deposit much.

Never make these skillsets obvious to others. You don't want others to know what you are doing and you don't want more people to do what you are doing. It's absolutely essential that your actions be camouflaged under appropriate gestures and words. Human beings invented language primarily for this purpose. 

Remember it's not easy to change your behavior. But if your child displays these behavioral traits be happy. They will survive better than you can.

I wish we were taught these skills in school than reading, writing and Rithmetic. It's only later in life that some of us realize that the 3 R's can't hold a candle to the Survival skills listed above.

To some of us, these survival skills are part and parcel of our genes. We don't need to be taught these. Other people that might benefit from these - to understand what's happening around them and, if at all possible, to exhibit the same traits. 

Remember we are not here in this world to be a runt and die. We have to survive. Only if we survive can we do anything good for others. If we don't survive, we can't do much for others anyway.

To test if you are feminine enough, you can answer the questions here https://vbala99.blogspot.com/2019/09/female-c-comprehension-and-application.html)