The whole idea of marketing (of the business kind or the feminine kind) is to ensure that they address or reach your S1. Advertisers would not want to reach your S2 with their messages. For an intro into S1, S2 read http://vbala99.blogspot.com/2017/10/thinking-fast-and-slow-daniel-kahnemann.html.)
When you say no to a request for help, if people respond with:
1. "You have no affection for me, you are so hard and inflexible"
2. "You were never harsh like this, you have changed so much"
3."Who else can i ask?"
Any form of desire and feelings being expressed appeals to the heart.
When people praise you for no real reason uttering empty phrases.:"Your work is so nice", "You are such a nice man."
Any form of desire and feelings being expressed appeals to the heart.
When people praise you for no real reason uttering empty phrases.:"Your work is so nice", "You are such a nice man."
They are addressing / reaching your S1 = heart. Not S2. You may tend to let your guard down.
Additional notes and examples of people reaching your S1:
There is a sense of urgency when they talk about an issue, the urgency creates an expectation of fast decision from you, avoiding the use of your S2. The problem people mention would seem to be big needing immediate attention from you.
- The situation could refer to their plight. "I have to pay my kids' school fees, it has to paid online only. I don't know how to make online transactions. And unfortunately my husband, who handles this always, is also out of town. Can you please please pay on my behalf. I will repay ASAP." Now if your S2 was up and running, it might have a few questions:. 1. Why don't you give me your card details, I will pay online using your card. 2. Why don't I explain to you and you can pay yourself? 3. Why don't you reach your husband? Is internet unavailable where he is? Why don't take the help of your teenage son for whom internet is a piece of cake? And so on. But the sense of urgency in your friend prevents your S2 from operating. You end up jumping to help her when it wasn't really warranted.
- The issue brought up could refer to your own plight also (in this case your action may benefit them - for example, an insurance agent tells you: "Imagine if you die tomorrow, what will happen to your kid, wife, take an LIC policy immediately." If your S2 was up, it may have raised the question of whether an insurance policy was essential currently, what should be the maximum premium, comparison of LIC's policy with other policies etc.
Most advertisements want to reach your S1. They don't want you to use your S2 and start probing logically into their message "Our toothpaste / toilet cleaner / shampoo / car is 23% better than our competitors'. We work hard so you can sleep easy." Imagine if the message was wrongly delivered to your S2. How would you process the message above and what would your brand recall be?
Why are we urged not to make a decision when we are angry? When we are angry, we are usually riding our S1. Not the best time to make any big decisions when S1 is completely in control.
When people address your S1 and if you are a thinker, that's like telling you to cut your onions with the knife in your left hand. Quite a difficult task. All you have at the end is just tears.
Can you have your S2 always up? No way. But you may have identified certain people as being ones who only talk to your heart and take you for a ride, especially if you are a thinker (as in MBTI). Set an internal alarm that wakes up your S2 as soon as you encounter this people.
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