Thursday, July 29, 2021

Can I Call You Tomorrow At 4PM

I thought such a request, as in the subject line, meant that the person has committed to call at 4. 


It turns out that the "can I call you?" for many people (P type, as in MBTI) is in fact about getting a right to call and not an obligation to call.


I always assumed that the question created an obligation.

It took me so many years to realise it's just a right.


A related anecdote:

A friend of mine wanted her brother to come to her place to get something done. She kept reminding him and then he asked her whether she would be home at 3PM. She confirmed. She was waiting from 2:45PM till 4PM for her brother. But he didn't turn up. When she called her brother and asked him what happened, he explained that HE had asked her whether SHE will be home at 3PM. He pointed out that he never told her he will come to her house at 3PM.

Another case of a right (to come) but no obligation (to come). My friend had interpreted her brother's question incorrectly.


So it makes sense to confirm whether someone is assuming an obligation or just a right when they say (or ask) something.


Additional reading 

https://vbala99.blogspot.com/2021/07/proposing-to-multiple-women.html


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