She is very emotional.
Has a complete lack of understanding of personal responsibility in the context of cause and effect.
Imagine someone raped me. I slapped him. And then explains what happened that he did such a thing to me. We discuss it. And then he questions me why I slapped him. And that's all he remembers of the event. Not what he did earlier.
This is how she is. Doesn't take responsibility for her action at all.
A liar, emotionally manipulative. Isn't capable of generosity. In case of emergency, would want to make sure she doesn't get stressed. Hates stress to herself. Extremely poor sleeper.
Is capable of moving from saying she loves someone to the point where she wants to sleep with someone else in the space of 5 minutes.
Emotionally manipulative enough to know how to guide someone to propose to her and get him to want to sleep with her - her lack of touch with reality would make her claim that the other person proposed all on his own. When she explained her plan to get intimate with her old flame it was eye opening.
Nice enough that her kids are comfortable with her and like spending time with her. Has a bunch of friends and colleagues that she is in regular touch with.
Her emotional needs are insatiable. Likely pointing to NPD and or BPD while she jokingly referred to bipolar in herself.
If someone has an emergency she would say she will be there. And she would mean it literally. She will be there. Not doing much, perhaps texting or otherwise keeping herself engaged in things not relevant to the emergency.
Can't be relied upon to be consistently dependable and organized.
Is very bright and intuitive.
She has a tendency to take key words out of a sentence and create a different meaning out of the sentence.
For example, if someone said they disliked prostitutes taking money for sex she might interpret that to mean that the person called her a prostitute.
Has a huge void inside her like an emotional black hole and she seeks to fill it. She needs a person who will live for her, whether she can or will reciprocate is something she really doesn't much care about. Dedication to any person or thing doesn't come easily to her.
The love she proclaims that she has for an adult is the love that a woman has for chocolate. Not the love that a mother has for a child.
While her knowledge of maths and numbers is fairly limited, a maths problem at the level of grade 5 may be difficult for her, she says she teaches her children (in class 9) maths. This is an example of how she misrepresents reality. The truth perhaps (a guess) is that she sits with them and keeps them company and suggests that the children read this book or call up that friend to solve the problem and makes tea for them. Most mothers do this. This is not teaching maths.
Claims that she knows a language when she can understand it at best and hardly speak it. This claim wasn't made in jest.
She said that her husband complained to her that she wasn't all there with him ever. She acknowledged that this was so.
She is preoccupied with her own emotions. Even when with her so called ideal man she said she would be on dating site chatting up others.
While she claims she is a very good housewife and mother, my belief is she spends way too much time with her own activities.
In short, a very high maintenance person. She is used to a very high class of living. A kind that she most likely cannot get with her own efforts.
All the good things in her life have been provided for to her. Her best accomplishments would not be commensurate with what she has been given.
She is not much bound my normal sense of restraint. She stays in the marital home because of her needs for the comforts that it provides while disliking the provider. I am sure she thinks she is an equal to "the provider" because she is married to him and has borne his children.
She has a high sense of self worth, perhaps out of very high needs. She is likely to suck the life out of any adult who is close to her so much so that they may wish to have her leave soon. There is a good amount of arrogance - the casual use of words that put down others.
While she asserts that people hurt her often and that she is a doormat, I think she hurts others much more often.
She claims that in relationships she assumes the guilt whenever there is an issue. But she frequently blames the other party for the issues. Her behaviour, according to her, have not been the cause but then she says she assumes the guilt, giving herself a saintly aura.
She comes very close to a person having a personality disorder. She claims she never gets angry. She is capable of extremely intense emotions including anger.
Relationship with her ideal man is more of satisfying her own needs and would involve little of satisfying his.
She is self centred, unempathetic, extremely needy, controlling. And constantly on an emotional rollercoaster.
A relevant article in this context: https://www.ckju.net/en/dossier/machiavellianism-what-it-how-recognize-and-cope-machiavellians
She is certainly not psychopathic.
In summary, what she says doesn't seem authentic. Her words can't be taken at face value.
She said she was raised in a very loving family lacking nothing that a child would want.
Why then? What happened? How did she turn out this way?
Additional reading:
https://vbala99.blogspot.com/2021/10/to-lizard-with-love.html
