A friend of mine was telling me about two of her friends A and B. She described both of them to me. Both "celebrated" (her words, not mine) sadness. She knew A for 2 years and likes him. She knew B for 2 days before she dumped him.
That made me curious. What was the difference between the two, I asked her.
She explained. A, while a constantly sad person by nature, was organised and fulfilled his responsibilities. She appreciated this in A.
B, on the other hand, was constantly in pain. Not doing anything with his life, just whining. She couldn't take this.
I thought through what my friend said. I had thought sadness and pain were similar. Now I feel they are quite distinct from each other. A person can like sadness and still be responsible and be active.
A person in pain is very different. The pain prevents the person from handling any big responsibility. I had a friend who was a HSP, with pain in every organ. She was a housewife who cooked one meal a day, just for herself. And few days of the month, couldn't even manage to do even that.
A person in chronic serious pain (no matter what the cause) ends up in depression, in which case he hardly handles any responsibility, or in the worst case suicide. They seem to relish and live for the pain. An important part of their identity is their pain.
And I heard that the person, while he was attracted to sadness could never tolerate (expression of) pain either in himself or in others. He was pessimistic by nature. He appreciated sadness as a mood as others appreciate happiness or humour.
Sadness is perhaps not expressed. But the "kickback" for pain is in the expression of it.
Pain flows from Venus, sadness from Saturn.
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