This is a (true) story about a married friend of mine and two of her friends.
1. She had a friend SUT a few years back. My friend had a strong marriage - she and her husband were quite close. Now this friend SUT, for some reason, couldn't stand my friend's good marriage and tried different ways to mess it.. My friend was unaware of what was happening while her husband figured it out. Her husband couldn't stand SUT. He told his wife to stay away from SUT. My friend, being a docile person, did exactly the opposite and let SUT spoil her marriage further.
2. My friend had another friend SUD, a neighbour actually, who was a businessman with a wife and children. One fine day the man returned home from work, told his wife to pack her bags and go for some time to her parents' place. After the lady left with the children, the man committed suicide. He apparently had run up huge debts.
Note that we do not know whether he was a dirty businessman or not.
Now this is all I know about both SUT and SUD.
My friend felt that the man SUD was guilty of 1. having had poor business acumen 2. Having given up and ending his own life 3. Leaving his wife and kids in dire straits
My friend was more positive about her lady friend SUT who despite everything was, most importantly, alive and also happy.
Like the Vetaal I ask this question: was my friend right in her appraisal - that the man SUD was a more awful person than the lady SUT?
Is there any Vikram out there? Is surviving somehow more important? The most interesting thing in this whole story is that my friend is one of the cleanest people I have come across and would never do anything like what SUT did.
I guess my friend gave more weight to surviving against odds (which SUD didn't) than to character (which SUT didn't have). Well, my friend has been under a lot of stress recently and has been known to make mistakes with weights elsewhere too.
I forgive her.
Recently, in Mar 2018, my friend told me she was pissed off with another friend of hers (TLS). The reason being that TLS gleefully told my friend that she, TLS, had helped her (TLS') good friend (P) divorce her spouse. TLS, incidentally hates the institution of marriage. One can only speculate what exactly the problem was between P and her husband. And even whether there was a problem.
Now, here comes the twist. My friend was furious with TLS because, as per my friend, TLS had helped destroy a family and then bragging to my friend about it.
I pointed out to my friend that TLS had, most likely, good intention at heart and thought that P world be better off without her husband. And that TLS had only done P a good turn. But, SUT truly had tried to destroy a marriage, and to this day my friend comes in support of SUT. But her anger against TLS is enormous.
Women...
Recently, in Mar 2018, my friend told me she was pissed off with another friend of hers (TLS). The reason being that TLS gleefully told my friend that she, TLS, had helped her (TLS') good friend (P) divorce her spouse. TLS, incidentally hates the institution of marriage. One can only speculate what exactly the problem was between P and her husband. And even whether there was a problem.
Now, here comes the twist. My friend was furious with TLS because, as per my friend, TLS had helped destroy a family and then bragging to my friend about it.
I pointed out to my friend that TLS had, most likely, good intention at heart and thought that P world be better off without her husband. And that TLS had only done P a good turn. But, SUT truly had tried to destroy a marriage, and to this day my friend comes in support of SUT. But her anger against TLS is enormous.
Women...
Feedback:
ReplyDeletea. If it was a strong marriage as you had stated, it could not have got messed up by third party interference no matter how strong that force was. The fact that it got messed reveals it was not strong enough.
b. SUD was a coward who could not face failure. According to me, I am wasting my time if I think about this character.
c. In case 1 if that lady was happy, she should have faced it upfront and called off the marriage and carried on with her new found happiness which also maybe might get worn out someday just as the marriage. Every relationship as depicted in this case seems to be a temporary need and feeling which is strong at a point and then with time has the capacity to be worn out by an outside influence. If SUD could manage to break a strong marriage then tomorrow another SUDDD might break the relationship with SUD too... A temporary phenomenon maybe.
All she probably needed to ask herself was what if she was the HUSBAND? Would this situation be as easily acceptable to her? Someday her inner conscience will ask her this and she might end up feeling very miserable - a huge cost for this new found temporary happiness is it not?